Trust and Entrust
Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Romans 12:12 NIV
May God himself, the God who makes everything holy & whole, make you holy & whole, put you together—spirit, soul, & body—& keep you fit for the coming of our Master, Jesus Christ. The One who called you is completely dependable. If he said it, he'll do it! 1 Thessalonians 5:23,24 MSG
Insight
Close your eyes for a moment and think of a one-word description of how you feel right now. I know, I know - you're reading, but just for a moment, take this time to get still and quiet - what comes to mind about how you feel?
Many of us are challenged by the pace of our lives and the continuous bombardment of thoughts that race through our heads. So much so that we may default into a robotic stance of just trying to get through another day. Eventually, physical, emotional, and spiritual numbness can set in.
Have you been there? Perhaps it's where you are right now. I've been there, and I'm fighting hard right now not to succumb to the irresistible lies of the enemy, to give up, and to return to the feeling of being undone, reduced to a puddle.
Throughout 2023, my emotions teetered back and forth from sheer numbness to exuberant gratitude. A part of me doesn't want to linger long reflecting on the past - it's been too hurtful, painful, and exhausting. And yet, remembering 2023 is also a telescope magnifying the great faithfulness of my God, bringing it into clear focus amidst the haze of chaos.
I started 2023 dreading the thought of having lost treasured memories of my mom before she got sick in 2020. I feared that all I had left was the horrors and regrets of her last 2 1/2 years. The loss of four close family members within a year, along with an unexpected sibling drama, took its toll on my emotional and spiritual well-being. And yet, God never wastes an opportunity to reveal and refine oneness with Him through whatever.
With the help of the Personal Retreat, I've sorted through the cascading emotions of 2023. The struggle to regain some sense of sanity and balance amidst a cacophony of fiery arrows from every angle has the power to decimate hope. Intentional reflection through the lens of my identity as a beloved child of God with an absolute resolve to trust Him entirely is the only way to combat the struggle and loosen the grip of overwhelming emotions threatening to rob me of all hope.
God often revealed Himself to be faithful, trustworthy, steadfast, and good. I would have missed seeing Him if it were not for the practice of clinging to Him and His Word. Sheer desperation to claim and receive every promise of His Word led me to ask Him to help me see Him in the midst of whatever was happening - to guard my heart against despair because He is my God of hope. He will fill me with all joy and peace as I trust in Him so that I may overflow with hope by the power of His Holy Spirit that abides within me.
So I'm learning to live my actual lived life not driven by circumstances, but by my faith in the One who rescued me from the domain of darkness and transferred me into His kingdom of light. By faith, I can be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, and faithful in prayer.
I’m learning that my greatest challenge comes in the form of trust and entrust. It is a battle of not only my mind but my will and resolve to trust God no matter what and to learn to entrust unto Him everything - nothing held back. His refining work in me through an invitation to be still and ponder creates a renewed passion for closing my eyes just to be. I can see so much more clearly, and I don't feel so undone when I do.
Reflection
Did you find it difficult to close your eyes and be still? Was it challenging to find a word to describe your feelings? There is excellent value in mining for the "why." Spend some time asking God to reveal what's behind the difficulty. Be patient and ready to receive His wisdom.
Are you consumed by the harshness, the hurtfulness, the unwantedness of your present circumstances? Is the lens you are viewing your actual lived life a lens of despair? God is not unaware of the pain and struggle we bear.
Prayer
Heavenly Father, in the stillness, we seek Your strength to resist despair and find hope amidst life's challenges. Illuminate Your faithfulness as we cling to You, joyfully trusting in Your promises. Fill our hearts with Your peace, enabling us to navigate difficulties with patience and faithful prayer. In the battle of trust, empower us to surrender all to You. Amen.
Polly Clawson, Equipping Coordinator, wrote today's devotional.