Tragedy Olympics
“For the Kingdom of Heaven is like the landowner who went out early one morning to hire workers for his vineyard. He agreed to pay the normal daily wage and sent them out to work.
“At nine o’clock in the morning he was passing through the marketplace and saw some people standing around doing nothing. So he hired them, telling them he would pay them whatever was right at the end of the day. So they went to work in the vineyard. At noon and again at three o’clock he did the same thing.
“At five o’clock that afternoon he was in town again and saw some more people standing around. He asked them, ‘Why haven’t you been working today?’ They replied, ‘Because no one hired us.’ The landowner told them, ‘Then go out and join the others in my vineyard.’
“That evening he told the foreman to call the workers in and pay them, beginning with the last workers first. When those hired at five o’clock were paid, each received a full day’s wage. When those hired first came to get their pay, they assumed they would receive more. But they, too, were paid a day’s wage. When they received their pay, they protested to the owner ‘Those people worked only one hour, and yet you’ve paid them just as much as you paid us who worked all day in the scorching heat.’
“He answered one of them, ‘Friend, I haven’t been unfair! Didn’t you agree to work all day for the usual wage? Take your money and go. I wanted to pay this last worker the same as you. Is it against the law for me to do what I want with my money? Should you be jealous because I am kind to others? Matthew 20:1-16 NLT
Insight
We have a tendency to measure our sufferings against what others have experienced.
If we believe we have endured “greater” hardships than those around us, we tend to get bitter. We come to view those with “easy lives” as whiny, ungrateful, and naive. We look down on them for struggling, and we label their problems as “superficial.” We become proud of the spiritual insight we’ve gained from our trials. We assume that those with “trouble-free” lives must have lesser faith. But worst of all, when we’ve navigated deep pain, we tend to feel more entitled to God’s favor. We think that He owes us more, because we have had to battle “more demons” than those around us. It’s the same attitude as saying: “I’ve been toiling in the hot sun all day, so I deserve more than the people who sauntered in at 5:00.”
On the flip side, if we have endured “less” than those around us, we feel as though our struggles aren’t valid. We minimize our own pain. We feel like we don’t have the “right” to experience hard emotions. We feel ashamed that we have health, wealth, and privilege, because we don’t feel worthy of the favor we’ve received. We know that we don’t deserve ease in our lives any more than those who are navigating chronic illness, grief, abuse, and financial struggles. We don’t believe our testimonies are worth sharing, because we haven’t braved through some epic tragedy. Our story of faith sounds less like a hero’s journey and more like the tale of an average joe. We “work the fields” for an hour, and get the same pay as the people who’ve run themselves ragged. It’s deeply uncomfortable.
The radical, frustrating, and beautiful thing about our God is that He empathizes completely with our pain, whether we just stepped on a lego or just lost a child. In God’s eyes, every hurt is real. We don’t have to hit a certain “threshold” of suffering before God cares. He has compassion for every minor inconvenience and every colossal heartbreak. The Gospel of grace is the same for each of us. Regardless of what our lives have looked like on earth, the reward is the same: Jesus Christ.
How much we’ve suffered doesn’t dictate how much of God’s favor we get.
Our struggles are not worth comparing. We’ve all experienced the horrible consequences of living in a fallen world, in ways big and small. We don’t have to play the “tragedy olympics” here on earth, because the sting of sin affects every one of us.
We are called to imitate our Father (Ephesians 5:1). This means that we ought to “rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep” (Romans 12:15). No matter how “small” others’ problems seem from the outside-looking-in, we are called to show genuine care for our neighbors. Conversely, when others’ pain seems daunting and unmanageable, we are called to walk alongside them through the darkness.
Hurt is hurt. God is moved to love in response to any and every hurt—so we should be, too. We must have compassion for our pain and the pain of others, no matter how “big” or “small” the pain may seem to us.
Reflection
Which do you struggle to see as legitimate: your pain, or the pain of others? How can you view these trials (and those who are affected by them) through God’s eyes?
Prayer
Abba, thank You for empathizing with our pain, no matter what form it takes. Thank You for caring deeply for every one of us, no matter what we are facing. Thank You for offering us Your Son and for promising us eternal freedom from suffering. Help us to validate our own pain and empathize with the pain of others. We love You, and we thank You for Your radical grace. It disturbs, unsettles, and challenges us—and that is the very thing that makes it so great. Amen.
Port City writer Kate Redenbaugh wrote today’s devotional.