Not Too Close
Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is. Ephesians 5:15-17
Insight
When my youngest daughter was a toddler, my wife and I took our daughter to a state park near where I grew up in western Maryland. The park is on the side of a large mountain and overlooks the town below. To say the views are spectacular would be an understatement. When the leaves begin to change, it is a thing of beauty. Our daughter, who was learning to walk, wanted to get a closer view and started to head towards the edge. Fortunately, mom was quick on her feet and swooped her up. An added layer of protection was a guardrail that kept people from the steep drop-off that lay on the other side.
Guardrails protect us from danger. Anytime we get behind the wheel of a car, ride our bike or walk on a trail, we notice these guardrails. These boundaries keep us from heading to places we shouldn’t go. They alert us to danger on the other side. But, here’s the thing. Boundaries aren’t only necessary in our everyday experiences. They are critical in our spiritual life, where we pursue integrity and reflect God’s character.
Boundaries are important because no matter who you are, what you struggle with, whether you’re a Christian or not, married or not..no matter who you are, one fact remains true: our greatest regret relationally, morally, or ethically--whether in the past or yet to come--could have been or can be avoided. Avoiding these regrets has almost everything to do with boundaries.
Our natural tendency is to push ourselves to the limit and get as close to the line as possible. From our limited perspective, boundaries appear restrictive. Nothing about them seems freeing. We want to live our lives without restraint. We don’t realize the regret that lies on the other side.
Rather than restricting our lives, boundaries free us to live without worry of a moral fender bender or, worse yet, a complete wreck. No one has ever said they’ve regretted setting up boundaries, but numerous people can tell you story after story about the chaos that a lack of guardrails in their lives created.
It is critical to establish boundaries that influence our actions and words. We need to pay attention to the way we walk. We must steward our influence well, which begins by protecting one’s integrity. Each of us has areas in our lives that left to our own devices we’d get in trouble by giving up control of our heart and mind to something or someone else.
Chances are reasonable, you already know where you need to plant a guardrail, where you need a personal standard of behavior that informs your heart. Setting boundaries is a way of preserving yourself for God’s plans for your life. You have no idea what God has in store for your future, and you could miss it if you don’t set up healthy boundaries.
Reflection
What guardrails do you need to set up to protect your character and integrity?
Prayer
God, open my eyes to the places where I’m vulnerable. Please help me avoid the danger on the other side by creating boundaries in my life. May I steward my influence well by protecting my integrity. In Your name, Jesus. Amen.