Choosing Silence
“The heart of the righteous ponders how to answer, but the mouth of the wicked pours out evil things.” Proverbs 15:28
INSIGHT
One of the blessings we have in the United States is freedom of speech. There are some oppressive countries where systems are put in place to silence people's voices, depending on their gender, race, or economic status. Unfortunately, we have twisted our freedom of speech, believing we have the freedom to say whatever we want without any consequences. What we don't realize is that our words carry more consequences than we realize.
We have all had those moments where we said words we could not get back amid frustration or passion. Landing on ears that could never forget, they left scars. For those of us who are Christ-followers, the stakes have never been higher for our words. King Solomon wrote, "Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits" (Proverbs 18:21). This verse tells me that there is no neutral landing spot for our words; each word we speak is in investment in either life or death. Ultimately, harmful words create separation between us and God and damage relationships with others.
So, how do we move from harmful words to speaking life? As odd as it might sound, the first step we can take is to choose silence. Silence makes a lot of us nervous because quietness can be awkward. In heated conversations, we hardly ever give silence a thought. But I love how Jesus modeled choosing silence when He walked on this earth. People would question His identity, His work, His character, and His mission. Now, Jesus being 100% human means He probably felt the temptation to fire back and defend Himself. We often justify harmful words by saying we need to "give someone a piece of our mind," or "they just need to hear the truth!" But when faced with the temptation of firing back harmful words, He chooses silence. Jesus would not utter toxic words because He was prioritizing relationships.
Think about this: Jesus was FULL of truth and grace, yet never spoke a harmful word. Even when Jesus was in immeasurable pain and agony carrying a cross to die on, not a single harmful came from His lips. We, on the other hand, love to win arguments and have our voices heard.
If you feel like that is not valid, just let someone say something about: your sports team, political party, faith, children, family, career, or anything else and see how your default response suddenly becomes defensive and about winning. When we set out to win arguments, we set up to lose a relationship.
The call of being a Christ-follower in this world means we will take a lot of losses, and that is okay. It is okay because we are not playing the same game as the world. The world encourages us to win arguments, but Jesus calls us to lose just about everything for the sake of His glory. We must win the relationship over the dispute every single time. Jesus did it, and He did so by choosing silence.
Silence is more potent than harmful words. When we feel the temptation arises to say whatever it takes to defend ourselves, we have to choose to surrender to the more excellent call. When you choose a relationship over an argument, you choose Jesus, and you side with love.
REFLECTION
What areas tempt you to use harmful words?
How could silence in those areas help you represent Jesus?
PRAYER
Father, I confess that I find myself using my words for harm. Help me see the weight of my words and how they are a gift from You. May my words reflect You. In the tempting moments to use harmful words, lead me to silence. The people You have placed in my life are always greater than an argument. In Your name, Jesus. Amen.
Port City writer Davy Nance wrote today’s devotional.
