Attention vs. Love
"Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth." 1 John 3:18 (NIV)
Insight
In our hyperconnected world, it's easier than ever to get attention. A carefully crafted social media post, a controversial comment, or even a dramatic life update can instantly draw dozens of reactions, comments, and temporary interest from others. We've become masters at gaining attention, but are we missing something deeper?
I recently watched a young couple at a coffee shop. Both were on their phones, occasionally showing each other funny videos or memes, collecting likes on their latest posts, and responding to comments. They were physically together, but somehow emotionally distant. Each was seeking and receiving attention from their digital world, yet the genuine connection between them seemed lacking.
This scene made me reflect on how often we settle for attention when what we really crave is love. Attention can feel like love in the moment – it provides a quick emotional boost, makes us feel seen, and temporarily fills our need for connection. But unlike genuine love, attention is fleeting. It's a sugar rush for the soul that leaves us feeling emptier when it fades.
True love runs deeper. While attention says "I see you," love says "I know you, and I choose to stay." Attention might give us 100 comments on a post about our struggles, but love shows up at our door with a warm meal and a willing ear. Attention celebrates our highlights; love walks with us through our darkest valleys.
Jesus demonstrated this distinction perfectly. He didn't just attract crowds and attention – He invested deeply in relationships. When He met the Samaritan woman at the well, He didn't just acknowledge her presence; He engaged with her story, understood her pain, and offered her living water. When Martha was busy seeking attention through her service, Jesus reminded her that Mary had chosen the better portion – sitting at His feet in loving relationship.
In our own lives, we might find ourselves choosing the easier path of seeking attention rather than investing in love. Maybe we share our problems on social media before calling that friend who's always been there for us. Perhaps we count our followers more carefully than we count the meaningful conversations we've had this week. Or we might find ourselves performing for approval instead of being vulnerable with those who truly care.
The challenge for us today is to recognize when we're settling for attention as a substitute for love. Are we willing to do the harder work of building genuine relationships? Can we step away from the instant gratification of attention to invest in the slower, deeper work of loving and being loved?
Love requires more from us than attention ever will. It asks for our time, vulnerability, commitment, and authentic presence. But it also offers what attention never can – true connection, lasting joy, and the profound sense of being known and valued for who we really are.
Reflection
In what areas of your life might you be settling for attention instead of pursuing genuine love and connection?
What is one practical step you can take this week to deepen a relationship beyond surface-level attention?
Prayer
Loving Father, help us recognize the difference between attention and true love in our lives. Give us the courage to be vulnerable and authentic with others, and the wisdom to invest in meaningful relationships. Guide us to love others as You have loved us – deeply, sacrificially, and authentically. In Jesus' name, Amen.