An Open Rebuke
“Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.” Proverbs 27:5-6
Insight
A few weeks ago, I was heading out of town. It was a rare situation because I was going alone, without my three toddlers and my husband. I was looking forward to the trip, but I started getting nervous about leaving as the time grew closer. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust my husband or that I didn’t want to go; I just started feeling uneasy. All the “what if’s” and “maybe’s” started to get the best of me.
This is a decently normal feeling for moms; we spend so much of our time taking care of our children that there is a bit of nervousness about not being in control. But just because it is normal or natural doesn’t make it right. After a few days of overthinking all the possibilities, I called up a good and trusted friend who knows our family well and has a kid of her own. I explained the situation, shared my concerns, and secretly hoped she would help me come up with a better way to fix my predicament.
If I’m honest, though, her response stung a little. She told me I needed to let it go. She told me she understood how I felt and that she would probably feel similar, but then she pointed me back to Jesus. She reminded me that He is in control and that He has created each of the people in my children’s life with purpose. She reminded me that it is hard to let go but that I shouldn’t clench so tightly to MY WAY.
At that moment, I needed open rebuke and advice from a trusted friend. She could have kept it cordial and said she understands and moved on, but that wouldn’t have allowed me to grow. It wouldn’t have reminded me to release my grip and set my eyes on what Jesus was doing in that situation. It also wouldn’t have allowed another foundational block of trust to be built on our friendship. She is a friend that I trust because I know her heart, and I know that she will always point me towards God, not towards whatever I want to hear.
We all need friendships like this. We need it, and we need to be that for other people. Each relationship is an opportunity to connect. Too often, we long for deep and real friendships but then air on the side of flattery and keeping things lighthearted. The book of Ephesians tells us to speak the truth in love so that we can grow and become mature. It is a fine line to walk, but we will never grow without truth, and without love, we will never experience true connection. A true friend is trustworthy and loving, but more than anything, they help us to refocus and see Jesus during our trials.
Reflection
Who is always there to point you back to Jesus?
When a trusted friend challenges your perspective or speaks words of truth into your life, how do you tend to respond?
Prayer
God, thank you for today. Thank you for the friends You have put in my life that help me shift my gaze back on You when I get distracted. I pray for a softened heart to hear open rebuke from trusted friends and for the courage to be that kind of a friend to others. Amen.
Katie Robinson, Children's Ministry Home Coordinator, wrote today's devotional.
