A Faraway Dream
"So don't worry saying, 'What will we eat?' or 'What will we wear?' For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you. Therefore, don't worry about tomorrow because tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:31-34
Insight
Of the two of us, my husband is the dreamer, but I would say I also like to dream from time to time. For example, I've always dreamed of teaching abroad for a few years. Somewhere my kids could maybe learn a new language, and we could escape the hustle of our current culture. I think it would all work out beautifully, even though I'm sure there would be hiccups along the way.
As my husband and I have gotten more settled in our careers and our kids have gotten older and more connected with friends and activities, this idea seems more and more like a faraway dream. It looks like a grand idea that will likely never come to fruition, and there are days when that feels very daunting. There are days where I think I should fight for what I want. Sometimes I'm tempted to settle on the idea that I have a right to my desires.
For me, the worries of tomorrow are often linked to things I'm afraid of missing out on. What if we don't take enough family trips? What if we never invest in rental property? What if my kids grow out of wanting me to read to them before I read all the classics? What if, financially, we can't provide everything our kids deserve or desire? What if we never live abroad? All these things are good and good goals or dreams to work for, but I've had to learn to hold them loosely. Not because they don't matter but because what God sets before me today is far more important than the plans on my bucket list.
I can plan, work, and strive, but ultimately, those things are still fleshly desires that lead me to get what I want or want my kids to experience. The problem is that what I want isn't always what is best. As I look back at my dreams of 5, 10, or even 15 years ago, God has done things I could never imagine. He has worked in ways I never expected and opened my heart to desires I never knew existed. Some things have happened, and others have not, but the willingness to step into where He calls me has brought far more beauty and fulfillment than the desires of my flesh.
So, as I sit back and dream about what it would be like to experience something wholly different and exciting, I instead try to pause and ask God to show me something different and exciting where I am today. I ask His help in giving me eyes to see what He is doing where I am and what my role could be in that. Perhaps one day we will live abroad, and maybe one day we will house an exchange student from abroad. Perhaps the dream is just that, a dream. Either way, I've been learning to trust His lead and let go of the scheming to ensure I get what I want. Not because the wants are wrong and not because I shouldn't follow my dreams, but because I've seen how much better His way is than mine. I've seen myself develop a heart for people and things I never thought I would, and my fleshly desires fall short every time to the goodness He has shown me when I seek Him first.
Reflection
What are some of your dreams that you hold tightly to? What more could He have in store that you haven't yet considered?
What would it look like to pause the internal race of planning and executing to see what He is doing in front of you today?
Prayer
God, thank you for today. Help me pause and see something different and exciting right before me today. Help me to find the balance between intentionally being responsible and trusting Your lead. You know the desires of my heart Lord, yet I trust You. Amen.
Katie Robinson, Port City Kids' Home Coordinator, wrote today's devotional.